27/04/2015

Night out struggles your probably familiar with

Because we are all the same. Really we are. Unless you don't go out, in which case I applaud you and I will raise a glass to you. A glass of wine that is. Obvs.

- "I cant be bothered"

- Realising the 30 dresses you have in your wardrobe are not enough cause
"Eurghhhh I have nothing to wear!"


- Getting in the shower and despising the fact you actually have to shave. 

- Having to pretend to know what your doing when you do your make-up.
I've contoured so much my face now has angles.

- Regretting curling your hair half way through because "Owwwww my hand hurts"


- Being guilty of taking too many selfies, then regretting taking the selfies cause you look bloody awful in all of them. 

- Stupidly eating carbs an hour before leaving and looking like your with child.
Bodycon is now a terrible idea. 


- Not being able to find the only strapless bra you actually own or a thong cause it's really not okay to wear Elmo boxers on a night out. It's not okay.

- Realising no one has actually called for a taxi. 

-  Genuinely wanting to cry when you realise it's raining outside.
My hair! My face! Its M-E-L-T-I-N-G

- As if I have to pay to get drunk. I could be buying something good with this money, something worthwhile.

"What was that? 4 jaegers for a tenner did you say"


- "I wonder how many more times they'll play Single ladies until I actually have a boyfriend"

- That song will be played that the whole squad loves. Cue synchronized moves that quite literally clear the dance-floor.

- Spending at least 1/4 of your night in the toilets because one simply cannot just pee then leave.

- Being overwhelmed by your desire to eat full fat everything. It just wouldn't be the end of the night without some cheesy chips.

- Someone will probably fall over, and that's fine just as long as its not you.

- *Morning after*
 "Why did I bother?" 

17/04/2015

Gone and got myself an internship

Ive only gone and got myself an internship.
HALLELUJAH!



*insert a gazillion clappy hand emojis*

It's only taken me about 10 years.
Slight exaggeration but after writing about 50 cover letters that literally all sound the same yet have to be 'unique and interesting' enough not to send the poor sod reading it to sleep, can you really blame me?
So yeah it does feel like 10 years.

I'm interning as a news features writer for nightclub and events directory site Licklist. As someone who is out until the early hours pretty much every Saturday night with a jager in hand I'd say the role fits me pretty damn well and hey who else gets to say that going out is "research".

I have to produce 2 articles each week that will feature on the sites news page. These will include features on and up coming festivals, nightclub event's and just general night out shenanigans. The style of the site is pretty humorous and witty much like my own style of writing. Basically being a bit of a sarcastic bitch seems to be what I do best. Who knew eh!
So if I do go a little off track in the next few weeks then I haven't moved to the middle of nowhere, I'm just a tad busier than usual. That being said I intend to stay on track with uploading content onto my blog and am still 100% dedicated to my little space on the internet.Just gonna have to make a few Gossip Girl shaped sacrifices, no more binge sessions for me.
*sobs uncontrollably*
Guess its time to be an actual working adult eh.

You can check out some of my articles here if you want to, or not, up to you!

06/04/2015

24 thoughts on a night out


1) Smoky eye or bold lip. Ohh what the heck, lets do both!

2) Well now I look like a beaten up clown. Fab. 

3) Must get a good selfie, this is borderline crucial. I will not leave this house until I have a good selfie. 

4) Okay artificial lighting is NOT flattering, or is that just my face. really hope that's not just my face. 

5) I look fugly in every single bloody one, fuck this shit.

6) The amount of crap I can fit into this clutch bag should be legendary. Do I have everything? Let's check for the 10th time just to be sure.  

7) Jager bombs or sambucca, equally disgusting. 

8) Cleavage (okay attempted cleavage) or legs, or both cause yeah. No shame.

9) Snapchat story is underway, now I must look like I'm having the time of my life.
Why am I not having the time of my life.

10) Literally my feet are about to drop off. 

11) Totally craving a greasy burger and chips right now.

12) Well dewy foundation was a mistake, I look like Edward Cullen but a really unattractive, sweaty version. In a playsuit.

13) Never wearing a play suit ever again, now I'm just half naked in a cubicle. All I wanted was to pee.

14) Hair is now as flat as a pancake, F you Elnett, you are not making me feel worth it right now.

15)  "Omg guys I've actually lost my phone. No joke"

16) Wine is not my friend. Why do I always go back. Whyyyyyyy?   

17) Also why is my lipstick never capable of staying on for more than 30 minutes. 

18) No idea who this random is in the ladies but pretty sure she's even more wasted than me. Let's take some selfies and be besties. 

19) Why is everyone hitting on my best friend and not me. God I knew I was the ugly one. 

20) Yes you can buy me a drink. No I will not make out with you. 

21) I am so drunk right now, I'm actually a mess. A disgrace. Maybe this is why I'm single. 

22) If someone could just carry me straight to bed then that'd be really great thanks.

23) Shit! Money for a taxi. 

24) Actually I don't even care I just want my bed.

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